gerryniswonger: I wait...and wait...and wait ! After a significant amount of time I figure the opponent disconnected
Wait longer, usually lobbies will have a 5 min timer, waiting 5 mins can seem like a long time.
If he is getting a load time out error, this can actually take even longer for him to 'click' into the game.
Allow HIM to have to forfeit. Go get a beer and point percy at the porcelain with your volume up, you will know when he has 'clicked in'