Bear-Your meter will never be perfect (understatement) but it doesn't have to rule your experience. For starters, you didn't say which browser you're using and this is key. I will lay out for you what works for me and you can take it for what it's worth.
I play on a Toshiba laptop with 4 GB RAM and a fast dual core processor. I don't do anything to my OS like Gamebooster does. I've dealt with that stuff by streamlining my msconfig file. This is not a scary thing and you can read more about it here. Scroll down to the last post on page 2.
I use the Iron version of the Chrome browser. You can DL it free here.This is a stripped down version of the Chrome browser without all the bells and whistles. The game is the only thing I use it for.
In actually playing the game the best approach to the meter issue is to slow your play down a bit. This can be done by holding your backswing for a count of 3 or so, waiting a few seconds after you make adjustments like aim and clubs but most of all get used to what it takes to let the swing go. Stutters and jerks rarely occur 2-3 times in succession so a few practice swings will help a lot.
I personally believe the slower meter ball you use is the cause of some of the aggravation because there's a lot more time for the meter to balk while heading toward the ding. I use the Tour-SD ball and i15 clubs and that's as fast as the meter gets. Before you think you can't handle that meter speed try switching to your free ball for a few rounds to see what it would be like.
Lastly, there will be times when the game is just being obstinate, for whatever reason. When this happens, if you're not in a multiplayer stroke game, save your game, exit out of the site and reenter. In Match Play you have 5 minutes to get back and your opp will be waiting. In other games, RGs, CTTH, etc. you will be given the option to return to the game. Oftentimes this will straighten out that obstinate game.
You will occasionally get hosed, usually when you least expect it. You're in a groove, the game's cruising along just fine and then BANG, up jumps the devil and you lose a ball in the rough 50 yards in front of the tee. Allow time for the f'n and sh*ting you'll go through but then, and here's the key, do no try to make some heroic recovery shot! Take your medicine, recover to the fairway and play on. This makes that meter skip responsible for you getting a par instead of a birdie or a bogey instead of par. Damage control.
I don't think the meter will change substantially in the near future (it hasn't in 16 months) so when I say don't let it rule your experience here, just deal with it like you would on a real course when you flub a shot. I hope this helps you because its made my experience more enjoyable, not getting hung up on it. GL.