gonfission: And what the heck is up with driver heads as big as grapefruits?
3 wood these days are nearly as large as the 1 wood and 2 wood with the wooden head back 15 to 20 years ago. These days hitting dinner plates.
gonfission: So if you don't mind, the difference between graphite vs steel shafts would be helpful information to me. Mid 50's in age, relatively fit.
http://blog.golfsmith.com/golf-equipment/golf-club-shafts-graphite-vs-steel/#.V24-jjU2V_g
Link gives a basic difference between the 2 shaft types. Normally driver and 3 wood + hybrids will be graphite and irons steel. Graphite shafts in irons you would haft to have a very slow swing speed to get any gain from them a lot females in there 60`s 70`s and 80`s use them and befit from them "faster swing speed" lighter etc etc.
gonfission: I understand there are 3 types of iron heads now also. All this I can read about. I would like to know from some of the people in here that use updated clubs and how they feel and differ from years past. Who prefers what and why?
I currently use Mizuno mp4 blades, blades are similar but very different to 15 years ago. The blades of past at times were very unforgiving if you missed by a hair it went nowhere and you sure felt it in your hands. These days you have more room for error, more forgiving.
Nuts of all your questions: In Australia we have what we call demo days. What that is a company example Ping, Taylormade, Titlist will come to a golf club and you can go try all there clubs on the range/ practice range (not sure if you have that in the USA or called a different name) or Pro/Golf shops may do it as well there. I would go along to a few try everything they have to offer.
Once you find a set of clubs this is very important i can`t stress how important this is (get them custom fitted for you) meaning again i refer to the demo days they also do fittings what means they will set up trackman or flightscope you start hitting balls the fitter changes golf shafts to find the right shaft for your swing. The heads lie angles may need to be adjusted as well.
I would never recommend someone buying something of the shelf as is, in some cases the stock shaft maybe right for them in most cases it won`t be.
Hope this helps a little feel free to msg me if you need any more information