The Las Vegas Knights is a small club that is looking for a few new members to swell the ranks, interact, have a laugh and be part of a club that regularly finishes in the bottom 500 of every Clash event, primarily because we don't turn up for them.
Here's our NPFAQ (Not Particularly Frequently Asked Questions):
When was the club founded? October 15th, 2010. So that's just over 9 years ago and we're still going strong.
How large are you? That's a rather personal question but taking it at face value the club is on the larger side of tiny, but the smaller side of not-very-large. There's 21 of us right now but we max out at 30 and have no plans to become larger than that.
Um....why not? Because we know who everyone in the club is and we like it that way. We don't want to be a club that has a bunch of people who never participate and who are virtual strangers. I mean, what's the point?
Do you have club competitions? Thank you for asking oh friendly virtual golfer. Why, yes we do! We really do. We have a comprehensive and themed season of tournaments that run from January 1st to December 31st. Play for yourself, play for your team, climb the rankings (hopefully) and lord it over your fellow club members. Click here and you can take a look at the results and fixtures of the current season:
LVK 2019 . It may not make a lot of sense at first glance, but it's easier than learning how to fold a fitted bed sheet.
Do you offer credit prizes? If by 'credit' you mean chest-swelling kudos, back-slapping and general congratulatory support from your fellow club members then yes, we certainly do. If by 'credit' you mean WGT's currency to be spent on balls to wallop into the fescue of St. Andrews then no, our tournaments offer approximately zero of those. All our tournaments cost the same, bargain basement rate of absolutely nothing to enter, which is uncannily identical to the amount you can win. But, you know....fun, right?
What about handicaps? I am unreasonably fond of chocolate and a good peaty single malt tempts me to the dark side, but as far as the club goes yes, we have a very balanced and comprehensive handicap system that genuinely offers every club member a chance to win tournaments and start spending all those no-credits-whatsoever that I mentioned above. In fact 81% of our current members have won at least one tournament this year.
Do you do the Clashes? I left a clue in my opening statement, but to be fair we don't have much of an official stance about them. As a club we don't take part, but as a club member you can if you want to and enjoy that kind of thing. We don't expect or even want you to buy passes for the club, or even use your free ones to help us level up. Play the Clash if you like, don't play if you don't. We'll love and support you no matter which WGT lifestyle choice you make.
So if I'm a member, what do you want from me?
We are not a needy, cultish, strict, loyalty-demanding, ambitious, drama-saturated club, we just want you to have fun. If you have fun, we have fun. The one and only thing we ask of our members is participation. Play the club competitions, or as many as you can. Play the WGT comps too of course if you like doing that, but don't play them and not the club ones. Say hi in the club forum and interact there. Be known to your fellow club members, let them appreciate your style, your wit, your skill, your lust for life. And if you can't manage lust then mild enthusiasm will do at a pinch.
So, you'll take anyone? Male, female, left-handed, right-handed, European, North/South American, Asian, African, Australasian, Antarctican...possibly even Martian, come on in! Unless you're a bit of a knob who likes to complain, gets angry, calls out other players, cheats or who thinks Yanni is the greatest musician the world has ever known, in which case we're closed. Sorry. Also, probably only Tour Master and above I'm afraid. It's not a snobbery thing, it's just a practical thing regarding the balance of the club and the tournament playing conditions. We wish you all the best though, sincerely.
Are you going to shut up soon? Imminently. All I'll add is that if you have got this far and you are still awake, congratulations! If you are interested in the club and want to know more then send me a friend request or post a message on my wall, and hopefully you'll want to come and be a Knight. That would be excellent. Give us a try, we don't bite. Much.
Cheers all.
Nigel (Wutpa).