I never go to funerals or weddings, EVER. I see them as one in the same...
Since I was traumatized @ 12 with my best friend's death. Parents made me go & look at his lifeless body. I can still see it vividly now. SMH
Bought a Cadillac Fleetwood extendo-limo... All my cohorts were getting hitched & I thought the best contribution to them all was to supply the limo for whatever events they wanted....
For free... They had to supply a driver.
The last time was for Bob & Jeans wedding. The girls took the limo & and went to the strip club. The men stayed at a friend's house with a large yard.
Long (very) story short. I ran myself over with my own limo.....Cop at the hospital thought I'd been shot with a shotgun, there was so much blood...
I should interject at this point the only sober person back at the party, was the bride...
She & the viper (wife) drove me to the emergency room.
Not a one of my friends let me forget that....
EVER
It came to be, the viper was the perp. Another day
Still, they chide me every time they see me