LOL
I recently found a real life "WGT golf club" and thought I'd give it a go. It seemed rather quiet so it looked like I'd have no problem getting a tee off. I walked into the Pro shop, was greeted with a smile and handed a card, and got straight onto the 1st tee. Excellent!
Knowing my game well, I set up for my drive and hit it perfectly. It sailed beautifully and settled in the middle of the fairway and long. Then, just as it stopped, what looked like a groundsman ran out from the tree's, grabbed by ball, carried it over to the fairway bunker, and threw it in. What!!??
When I got up there my ball was not only in the bunker, but had been trodden on and buried! I looked over at the guy and he was wearing a fluro yellow tabbard that said "VEM - Play it as it lies or withdraw". He just shrugged.
I managed to dig it out of the bunker and put my third onto the green. I read the putt from every angle and was sure that a firm stroke on the left edge would save my par. Then, just as I hit it a blower vac started behind me and blew my ball against the break and past the hole. What!!??? The same guy with the tabbard just looked at me and shrugged with an almost inaudible "unlucky"....
I thought "screw this!" and marched straight back to the Pro shop to complain. It had a sign up "Closed for 14 days - unless you're here to buy stuff."
I put my clubs back in the car and decided to go into the clubhouse and have a drink. There, in the middle of the floor was something called "Ready Go Roulette". I thought maybe I could still extract something from my visit so i walked over and tossed $10 on red. The guy working the table leant over, took my $10, and replaced it with $8. I said "WTF man, I bet $10!" He said "sorry Sir, for no really explainable reason we take 20% of all Ready Go bets."
When I left I realised why it was so easy to get a tee off at this club. The only good thing was I was able to park very close to the Pro shop and clubhouse. I was the only car in the parking lot!