This might lighten it up abit after a bad round. 1.Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.. 2 If it ain't broke, try changing your grip! 3. The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical, unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all of your many other errors. 4. A ball you can see in the rough from 50yds away is not yours. If there is a ball in the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker! If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint! 5. A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponent's luck! 6. It's surprisingly easy to hole a 40ft putt......for a nine! 7. There are 2 types of golfers-those who admit to cheating and those who lie! 8. When you look up, causing a terrible shot, you will always look down again at exactly the moment when you should start watching the ball if you ever want to see it again .. 9. If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age! And finally my favorite....10.Don't buy a putter until you've had a chance to throw it! Cheers GLG