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What Tiger Should Have Said

Tue, Apr 27 2010 9:09 AM (132 replies)
  • SweetiePie
    4,925 Posts
    Mon, Feb 22 2010 10:50 PM

    This is what Tiger should have said:

     I called this meeting so that every swinging dick and snapping clam with ears would get my position straight. I have been knockin it off with a great number of low women for several years now. I chose that over watching a bunch of Brady Bunch re-runs or shooting golf breeze with a host of morons that wouldn't know a good shot if they saw one. And I enjoyed and looked forward to "knockin it off". If this troubles you, I suggest you try the same, but realize you already are. When what I do with my time becomes your business, I will close it off. It is none of your business. I will allow you to watch me play golf when and where I choose to allow you to do so. If this is a source of discomfort for you, so be it. I do wish to extend the right for all to kindly kiss my entire ass. 

  • lilrob88
    870 Posts
    Mon, Feb 22 2010 11:31 PM

    LMFAO

  • OaktheToke
    409 Posts
    Mon, Feb 22 2010 11:51 PM

    LMAO, Sweets.  No one in their right mind would say that with the possible exception of Charles Barkley.  Here's Tiger's income from the last 3 years.  The first number is his salary and winnings.  The second number is his endorsements.  Guessing he'd rather preserve his family and the second number than shoot off from the hip. Then again, if he wasn't so concerned with the second number in the first place, he wouldn't be in this predicament.

    2009 - $7,737,626...........$92,000,000

    2008 - $22,902,706.........$105,000,000

    2007 - $11,941,827.........$100,000,000

    It puzzles me that many become so polarized over Tiger's so called "presser."  It was merely a performance for his corporate partners and an effort to quite the media storm in preparation for his eventual return.  Then again maybe his desired therapy is working and that's how he really feels.  It's his business not mine, I would just like him to hit the links.  The only words I wanted him to say was "I'm back."

    Tiger's biggest mistake was when he said 2 different words, "I do."  He should have just stayed single and enjoyed himself if that's what he wants to do.  We would champion him for being a stud, much like Derek Jeter.  

    I'm assuming he had already made his personal apologies to those who he's made promises to, chiefly his family.  I'm guessing his wife and kids could care less for words and would prefer sincere actions.  I know his kids never had the choice about picking their father and maybe they'd trade all the sports cars in the world for a pops that doesn't lie to them and go bang the waitress from breakfast when he told them he was going out to Toys 'R' Us.

    As for all of us slapnuts in the general public including myself, I could care less what he has to say outside of entertainment value.  I don't buy anything Tiger anyways and the closest I've come to using any of his products is the Whiteboard in my driver.  He owes me squat.

    See ya at Bay Hill Tiger.  I know I'll be watching, then again I watch most PGA tournys anyways.  Although he may skip the spring season and just eye a return for June gearing up for Pebble.

    But Sweetie, honestly you had me at "snapping clam"..........good stuff

  • YankeeJim
    25,827 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 5:40 AM

    LMAO SP-Coming from a female I think it carries a bit more credibility than if a guy said it. We say that and we're disgusting pigs to women.

    As far as Oak's review there my question is what in the world can you do with all that money if you have every toy there is? Kinda like the players here that have more credits than they can spend. They have everything in the pro shop they want and now what?

    I'm with Oak on caring less about the crap outside of golf. My best scenario has Tiger winning the Masters and sitting in front of those stuffy old white southern gentlemen with a s-eating grin on his face. How horrified would they be? 

  • jayjonbeach
    689 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 7:29 AM

    LOL - Nice one!

  • ralm1953
    1 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 8:25 AM

    Great article, Tiger has and will continue to do what ever he wants to do, until he is caught again. LMAO

  • GITrDONE
    701 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 8:31 AM

    YankeeJim:
    How horrified would they be? 

    Probably about as horrified as when they heard that one of his girl friends was a porn star.

    This behavior by Tiger is the first time the PGA has had to deal with one of they're members sleeping with porn stars.

    It's very sad that people will be able to just forget all about this and welcome him back on tour as if nothing ever happened.

     

  • OaktheToke
    409 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 10:44 AM

    YankeeJim:
    My best scenario has Tiger winning the Masters and sitting in front of those stuffy old white southern gentlemen with a s-eating grin on his face. How horrified would they be? 

    LOL, probably less horrified than they were last year when a non-english speaking Argentinian was walking around the clubhouse in a new green jacket.  Although I'm sure several club employees were fist pumping and had a bounce in their step for quite a few days.

    GITrDONE:
    It's very sad that people will be able to just forget all about this and welcome him back on tour as if nothing ever happened.

    You'd be surprised how many players on tour "sleep around."  In fact, the tour is somewhat notorious for it.  The apple doesn't fall to far from Tiger's tree and he's certainly not the first.  He's just bearing the brunt of the media storm because of his popularly and buzz factor of the details.  Not saying what he did was right, just saying other players are wary to speak without first looking at themselves in the mirror. 

  • SweetiePie
    4,925 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 12:32 PM

    What is interesting, is that this entire confab with Tiger began as innocently as anyone could imagine. Tiger, being a literature buff, hired a young literary scholar to help him straighten out his Longfellow...

  • GITrDONE
    701 Posts
    Tue, Feb 23 2010 5:11 PM

    Correct me if i'm wrong but I haven't seen any other member of the PGA Tour EVER get caught sleeping with a porn star to the degree that a public apology was needed.I haven't been watching golf very long and if it's as rampant as you say it is then they are all liars.Don't bother me,I still got a job in the morning and know how to avoid wasting my money by buying stuff to which the profit goes to scum.Thats the problem nobody quits supporting them money wise.To late now, he's got a ton of money,(another scott brown).

    I don't remember saying Tiger was the only one doing it either but I'll check after I post this.

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